Travel for the sake of one park.

The downside of paradise. Who got the whole world hooked on travel and why it’s not as good as it seems?

Traveling is considered one of the great joys of life. They cause a lot of positive emotions, help get away from the routine, allow you to see new places and meet different people. At least that is the impression you get when you watch travel shows and videos of popular travel-bloggers. They promote the idea of traveling by all means, which leads many young people to believe that not to travel is just criminal. How did traveling turn into a race for impressions? Why does this kind of recreation unsettles the psyche and forms complexes? And how to learn to rest properly, without the envy of vacation photos of colleagues in social networks?” worked out.

“I would never get into this bondage.

Recently, the prices of airline tickets and foreign tours have skyrocketed. Even so, marketers and social media are urging people to “live for today” and go on expensive trips, even if they can’t afford it. Some Influencers get advertised by travel companies, others choose their own destinations, which are immediately picked up by colleagues in the industry. Everyone rushes en masse to Paris, then to the Dominican Republic, then to Thailand.

As a result, many tourists, ready to go on vacation at any cost, are forced to take loans, in order to stay abreast of trends. Russian citizen Yelena succumbed to such pressure.

In one of the Maldives

On one of Maldives islands

Photo: Reinhard Kraus / Reuters

After seeing a lot of pictures from popular bloggers who traveled to the Maldives, Elena decided to head there at any cost. She had no money, so she took a three-year loan of 500,000 rubles at 8.9 percent interest. “I had a good flight, but the money flew away instantly, now I work without a vacation, and the repayment of the loan hangs over me like a sword of Damocles. If I had calmed down then, never would have gotten into this bondage, “- says the experience of a tourist.

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After that she had to read a lot of books on financial literacy, such as “The Girl with Money”, “Rich Dad, Poor Dad” and many others. The next trip she wants to plan more consciously and save money for a vacation in advance. In addition, she wants to budget for expenses that may seem insignificant at first sight: tickets to museums and exhibitions, entertainment, public transportation.

Anton, 29, from Tula, shared a similar story. Pictures of friends and popular bloggers from Trafalgar Square, the Tower, and the Sherlock Holmes museum kept him busy. Emotional, he bought a ticket to London and booked a hotel. For a British visa he needed at least 150 thousand rubles on his account. Anton was too shy to ask his parents and friends for money.

Pedestrians in front of the Tower of London

Pedestrians in front of the Tower of London

Photo: Dylan Martinez / Reuters

I had to take out a one-year loan. At first Anton wanted to pay the money back to the bank right away, but then he decided to save it for the trip. “I was nervous all the time about how I was going to pay the money back, but I kept spending. I lived a whole year under stress: I was afraid of not paying on time, I wanted to get rid of the bank as soon as possible, but I couldn’t do it. It would seem that I paid some 20 thousand rubles, but it is surprising that I did not have enough for a normal life,” he says.

“Endlessly photographed to show off to my friends.”

World Travel Monitor conducted a study that found that social media has been shaping trends in recent years. More than 75 percent of respondents said that travel blogs and travel forums have become the main source of travel information for them. The choice of tourists is influenced by vivid pictures, stories and reviews. Almost 50 percent of respondents trust this information.

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Every second travelers post new pictures and videos on their pages: here they are swimming in the azure sea, sitting in cafes and trying new dishes, sightseeing. These photos have become an indication of a successful and accomplished life. It is believed that the more countries you visit, the richer and happier you are. However, instead of enjoying culture and relaxing, tourists often elbow each other and run to take pictures, trying to visit as many new places as possible. At some point it ceases to be a trip and becomes more like a race.

On a Portuguese street.

On a Portuguese street.

Photo: Portuguese Gravity / Unsplash

A husband and wife from Moscow, Dmitry and Tatiana traveled to Portugal last summer. They agreed to spend the first part of their vacation in Porto and the second part in Lisbon. Usually they need at least five days to visit the country. In this way they could experience a foreign culture, get a feel for its color and peculiarities.

But Tanya could not sit still in one place, every day thinking up new cities and towns, we were constantly rushing somewhere and endlessly photographed, to boast to friends and relatives how much we saw. I just wanted to relax, not to get emotional: to walk through the streets of these two cities, drink vinho verde, eat seafood, look at the houses decorated with azulejo, and listen to fado in the evening.

Many travelers face a similar problem. After a vacation, they feel they need another vacation – to recover. This was the case for Irina, a 36-year-old resident of Yekaterinburg, while traveling in Italy. After a while, she began to feel like she was missing important moments in the pursuit of good shots. Now she tries not to bring her camera or take pictures on her phone, although she couldn’t stop herself before. “I would come and try to capture everything around me: the Cathedral of Milan, the Tower of Pisa, the Colosseum. And then I realized that instead of admiring what surrounds me, I was like a robot pushing a button. And I was losing the value of the moment,” shares the tourist.

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Some tourists take photos all the time.

Some tourists take endless photos

Photo: Benjamin Sow / Unsplash

Veronica from Zelenograd has a different problem: she was so addicted to frequent travel that she had to see a psychologist. Returning from one trip, she was already planning another. “I was like on a needle, my brain was full of nothing but that. So I was trying to escape from everyday life, family problems. When I was at home, I was sad all the time,” says the inveterate traveler.

In Moscow Veronika constantly tried to lose weight, went on diets, went to fitness, but as soon as she arrived in another country, her eating regimen instantly fell off: “I was like going off the rails. I didn’t care how many kilos I put on, I just wanted to live in the here and now. After a long course of therapy Veronica was able to get rid of her addiction. She now rests once a year.

Struggle and Survival

Psychologists believe that the constant desire to travel does not really lead to anything good. Travel ceases to be something that people truly enjoy, and becomes just another commodity to show the status of a person or family. As a result, this competition only leads to additional anxiety and stress.

“Most people, seeing pretty pictures on social media, say, ‘I want that, too.’ But ‘too’ is no longer my wish. It’s me wanting to make someone else’s wish my own. Such a race turns into a struggle and survival, and it has nothing to do with life anymore,” explains Svetlana Dulepova, psychologist and head of the online center “RasSvet”. According to her, in such a situation, it is better to create your own trend, based on your own desires. This could be anything, even a run in the morning.

Many like to vacation at home

Many people like to spend vacations at home.

Photo: Nathan Dumlao / Unsplash

Plus, there are those who are afraid of flying, don’t like to take the train or car. Or those who don’t like sleeping out of their bed. Experts say that this is perfectly normal.

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However, sometimes these people feel like outsiders and outcasts. People around them constantly press on their psyche, telling them that they are missing out on something very important

Anastasia complains that her friends constantly shame her and her husband for not going anywhere. But for them, even going on a trip is already unnecessary stress. Anastasia, 40, admits that she reads a lot, often goes to the theater, to exhibitions, is fond of poetry. “My friends don’t like any of that. But they have traveled halfway around the world. One day one of them brought a scratch map of the world where you have to mark the countries you’ve visited. They started making fun of us so much. It was very unpleasant. For some reason, society thinks that if you do not fly to Milan and Paris, you’re a second-class citizen, “- complained the failed tourist.

Her point of view is shared by 30-year-old Arkady from Samara. “Some people don’t like kissel, semolina and milk with foam, and I don’t like to travel. Turkey with its all-inclusive is already in my bones. I can’t drink and eat so much, and I’m sick of lying on the beach doing nothing either. I prefer to be at the dacha, go to the woods for mushrooms or sit with a fishing rod. And the anticipation arises in advance. I start to prepare tackle, check the boat, the tent, study the area,” says Arkady.

For many a holiday is a fishing trip

For many people a vacation is a trip to a fishing spot.

Photo: Federico Giampieri / Unsplash

For most people, refusing to travel does not mean they are “out of touch” and do not follow trends, but not all friends and colleagues are able to understand this. In such a situation, psychologists advise not to pay attention to the pressure of society or change the environment altogether.

“It is difficult to get rid of this pattern of behavior.”

Clinical psychologist, an expert on intuitive nutrition Svetlana Bronnikova says that one of the principles of marketing and the modern economy in general – to show people how to live right. This imposition in advertising is a constant psychological technique.

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We are clearly and very beautifully demonstrated that it is necessary to have a beautiful apartment, an expensive car, to dress in the “right” brand stores, to look like in a glossy picture, to go to the “right” vacation destinations. And people are hooked on this, because everyone wants to have a beautiful life, even if finances don’t allow it. Many because of this get into a debt pit and credit bondage. As a result they live beyond their means, only to show others that they are not worse off.

According to her, it is very difficult for people to get rid of this pattern of behavior. The approval of society is very important to them, and many are afraid of being judged.

Only quite mature people can ignore such attitudes, for whom family and time spent with them, the availability of free time, harmony in relationships with loved ones, self-improvement, and the opportunity to pursue hobbies are much more important than prestige and status

“It is necessary to set your own parameters of life and decide what is more important: to meet the expectations of others, in fact, to live for their approval or to follow your own life scenario – to value family more than beautiful clothes, and the opportunity to be with loved ones – more holidays abroad. This view is not formed immediately, but gives a great sense of freedom from the imposed attitudes of society” – advises the specialist.

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